Stephen used to set up elaborate drum sets in the living room, made out of pots and pans. No, not when he was a toddler. I'm talking about when he was ten or eleven. He'd wander around the house, drumsticks in hand, and randomly whack things that were metallic, or hollow, or wooden. When he found a sound that he liked, provided that the drumsticks wouldn't leave dents or scuffs, he'd drag whatever it was out to the living room to become a part of his kit.
His favorite "instrument" was a folding step-stool with a padded seat. It was all hollow metal tubing, and had a nice, low resonant sound.
Once he got his entire drum kit put together, he'd always start off playing along to a cassette of the same song: "Come Out and Play" by The Offspring.
I still think of him every time I hear that song.
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| Dedication at Hendy Avenue Elementary School, Elmira, NY |
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ReplyDeleteMy email address is my full name (no spaces), which you can find on my donation page, at gmail.com.
This one is from Meredith Tryon Rogers:
ReplyDeleteI remember:
The Davy Crockett play we performed;
Trick or treating with Stephen;
Stephen's Letter to his friends and family;
SAGE class and Stephen talking about you (he looked up to you-it showed in his stories);
Loving the Yankees;
Funny smart and kind
Now that I think of it..being one of Steve's classmates during that forever fateful 6th grade year really was a true blessing! Although at the time being someone who had a "crush" on Steve (since Mr. Prices 5th grade)and then moving up to Mrs. Vinulans 6th together again, life seemed so bittersweet...even before the crossed eyes, cancer diagnosis and devastating loss of a innocent child arrived into our little blue collar town...I had to worry about my bangs being curled under just right, working on my impressive kickball skills, and competing with all of the other(way cooler)peers at our little Hendy ave elementary school. Some of Steve's great qualities included drumming, not just hand and foot tapping but full on renditions of songs on his desk and books... I remember a very artistic young man, with an extremely extensive mechanical pencil set, who could draw amazing almost comic book type drawings, accompanied by what seemed at the time, the best cursive writing skills this side of finches bridge. Actually he possessed an enormous amount of athletic ability and knowledge as well. Always talking football and baseball, had the hats, jackect, and cards to prove it. As a matter of fact one of my most embarrassing stories as a girl included Steve. I can remember it like yesterday. I grew up literally a block from the school and 2 from town hall, so it wasn't a rare occurrence to run into Steve and all his boys' around the neighborhood. Mike, Geoff, Rob,and his golden glow crew and most other cool kids in our grade played baseball at town hall. I loved hanging around on my bike talking, goofing, riding around until the street lights came on with Missy, Kristen, Lori and Mandy, talking about all the boys in the dugouts and how their butts looked in their uniforms while chewing on cherry laffy taffy and sucking down blue slush puppies, giggling, flirting, gossiping. I remember writing KG + SH = TRUE LOVE under the wooden playground and wondering if he would ever see it. After a while everyone started heading home for dinner so I said bye to all my friends pressed play on my Sony Walkman and headed home. Being the "happy go lucky" kid I was I started sing along heading down Durland Ave. Assuming I was alone I took the corner onto our sidewalk and noticed someone right behind me on their bike following me. It was STEVE!! OMG! talk about EMBARRASSMENT! He had heard me singing??!!! Ahh! How long was he there!!? Sure enough I pull down my phones only to hear him say.... SING ALONE MUCH??! Oh man!!! He had heard me. Then whiz...off on his BMX as quick as he showed up. I walked into the house with a red face that day. I got PUNK'D. Ashton Kutcher had nothing on this kid. And im so happy I can tell that story. What a PUNK he was! Also a really nice, cool, kid, but a spit-fire most of the time. Which is probably why I liked him so much. And why is hurt so bad to loose him. The cute, athletic, hilarious, spunky, down-to-earth, artist, jokester!! THATS the kid I'lL never forget... Kt Gingrich (27 yr old Ovarian Cancer Survivor)
ReplyDeleteI feel lucky to have gone to school with Stephen. He was funny, smart and kind. He was always wearing a smile. I remember I had a nickname for him as "Little Shrimpie". It was an inside joke between us since I happened to be the tallest girl usually in elementary school and he was pretty small. I remember walking home to my grandmother's often and Stephen would always be with me and a group of others. I always admired his courage through the unfair circumstances that he was going through. I know that heaven is a brighter place with his smile and spirit. I think about Stephen often.
ReplyDelete--Lauren Lowman
Stephen Michael Haslett...
ReplyDeleteI would like to consider Steve and remember him as one of my bestfriends. I don't even know where to begin, but I can tell all of you one thing... There isn't a day that goes by in my life that I don't think about him at least once.
We grew up in the same neighborhood and I'm pretty sure our sisters introduced us to each other in kindergarten. That makes you about 5 years old right? Shortly after our newfound friendship I remember he was my first friend that ever stayed the night at my house. We played cars, ninja turtles, ghost busters, all while wearing our Karate Pajama's running rampid around my mothers house like crazy ninja's! I remember he was the red ninja and I was the black ninja (Crazy how you remember little details from the past). We practiced our karate moves on each other and spied on my sisters.
As we grew up 2 blocks away from each other and living in a small neighborhood we formed a "click" of friends that hung out whenever we could. We would play baseball, basketball, football, street hockey, hung out at each others houses or just played nintendo. Zelda sticks out in my mind the most! He was definately the best at that game. I remember most everyones name; Steve Haslett, Mike Ruth, Geoff Post, Scott Gams, Jesse Burgey, Adam Smith, Rob Brown and a few others... We were known as "The Glow Boys" Lol. I remember half way through elementary school Steve moved to West Elmira, thus splitting up our group of buddies. I remember we would nag on him for moving out of the neighborhood, but he promised he would never change. He was true to his word and kept that promise...
There are so many little memories I have a Steve I could honestly write a book. I will try not to turn this into a novel but at the same time give Steve his credit that he deserves.
He was an Artist. The BEST artist in our school. His talent was amazing. He was one of the smartest kids in our class. Always the first one to figure the work out and always willing to help the rest of us that had no clue how to do it!! In our Kindergarten performance I remember he was one of the narrators because he was one of the few kids that could actually read at that age.
He was an athlete and competitive for sure. For his size he kept up with the best of us never skipping a beat. Baseball was his sport. I remember having endless arguments with him over a foulball, a strike, or anything that would put either of our teams up on top.
He was in a lot of my classes at Hendy Ave and 5th and 6th grade stick out in my mind the most. We ate lunch with each other everyday in 5th grade always getting in trouble during "QUIET TIME" after we ate our meal. We had nicknames for certain teachers and jokes on a lot of our fellow classmates. Most of the time in good humor. lol. He would make me laugh harder than any friend I've ever had. Getting me in trouble A LOT by Mr. Price. He was there by my side to endure each punishment lol. I miss him so much... (continues below)
--Mike Ruth
In 6th grade we were in Mrs. Vinulans class together. Another year of laughing, jokes, lunch time sports, and all the time in the world to get in trouble together. That was the year he ended up getting sick. I remember it like it was yesterday. He sat next to me in the back of the classroom. This is a little moment I don't think I ever shared with anyone but I will today. On his desk next to mine he drew a silly face. I will never forget that face. It was a goofy smiley face. When he had to leave I remember I wouldn't let anyone erase it. It had special meaning to me. As I would sit in class with an empty desk next to me I would look at the face he drew and it brought me some sort of comfort. I wish I could have kept that desk for the rest of my life. But I do remember it stayed there for the entire year...
ReplyDeleteAs I read Kathys memories of Steve and reading her point of view of how everything happened, I can recall each moment myself and remember where I was, what I thought, and how it happened. It was chilling to put myself back at those times. Today I'm a grown man that works in prison and I'm not going to lie. I cried like a little baby reading her story. It was a good cry though. Because her little brother, one of my best friends taught us all soooo much in life. Being 12 years old and having to face something that dramatic... He is and always will be my Hero. I was there and wittnessed the entire situation. I could write another book about him being sick but I want to stick to the memories he would want everyone else to remember... "The Good Times"
Almost 16 years later he still effects my life. I have a 7 year old daughter who knows everything about him. We often visit him on his birthday and certain holidays. She even named our Cat Stephen!
There is so much more I want to write but I will leave it at this... Thank You for being a part of my life Stephen. Knowing you has made me a better person inside and out... Diane, Allen, and Kathy I love you guys!
--Mike Ruth
Steve was the BEST. Anyone that knew him would validate this as they have. His EVERY attribute EXCEEDED their meanings...He was EXTRAORDINARILY kind, humorous, artistically inclined, smart, outgoing...CUTE : ) to name just a FEW.
ReplyDeleteI knew Steve since I was 5yrs old. My grandmother has me on "lock-down" so it was not often that I made it out of the house, but I always saw Steve at school where he was always making me smile & help me with MATH, I was never very good at that; he was!!!!!
One day, about mid-way through elementary school, Steven ended up moving a block away from my home. That was when I started to see often, outside of school. My twin sister "Sandy" & cousin "Candice" were all the same age & practically joined at our hips!!!!! We ALL had a crush on Steve & use to bicker about which one of us he had a crush on!!!
I have very fond memories of riding our bikes together, up & down Church Street, on the sidewalks of course & at the Town Hall. My grandfather use to nickname everybody so we all use to laugh about that. Steve was called "Skimmer", a name he gave to only one other of my friends much later in life. He called him skimmer because he was clever, so clever that my grandfather believed he could figure out how to walk on water....Skim it, just as certain types of bugs do. We had an in ground pool & we were outside the day he thought of it.
I never knew if I would be called "Lizard Lizzy" or just Liz, my sister "Salamander Sandy" & cousin "Cat Candice". Either way, it didn't matter, all I know is that I always smiled when I was with Stephen Haslett. He was a kindred spirit and full of Love to give.
His room, it was covered in HATS. He LOVED hats. It was easy when buying a gift for him, a HAT!!!!!! All I see right now is HATS!! Really, he LOVED them......
The last day I rode my bike with my sister and cousin to his house to visit him after he became sick, a while after, all I remember is seeing his dad walk out on the ramp they had built for him with teary eyes. He told us Steve was sleeping. I remember this like it was yesterday. I knew the truth though, I could sense it. That was truly one of the saddest days of my entire life. The other was when my grandfather passed of cancer 8/2/2010. I REMEMBER THEM though, not their sickness....They were BOTH the BEST people I have EVER known....I Love You Steve & Grandpa ♥
-- Elizabeth Hall
I remember Steve always being in trouble in Mr. Price's fifth grade class, making him yell and the rest of us laugh.
ReplyDeleteHe was one of the three of us who went to another classes gym class so we could go to orchestra rehearsal. He always made me smile :)
-- Amy Duink
After writing what I just wrote earlier my mind has gotten the best of me... It's 1am and I can't sleep. The stories and memories of Steve won't stop coming. Hearing what my fellow class-mates as a child have said about him bring back so many feelings, thoughts and moments. Moments I'd like to share. Steve would often go to our other best friends house (Geoff Post). Geoff Post was Steves BEST friend till the end and lived two houses down from me. The 3 of us did a lot together. I remember him and Geoff would play the drums all the time. I would tag along just to admire their talent. We would play in the woods, capture the flag, play kickball, dodgeball, four square, anything that involved a ball we would take full advantage of.... He took a lot of pride in his Bike. We would ride our bikes all over town. I miss the jokes, the smiles, the laughs, the fights, the arguments, the carefree feeling of being a child. Steve made my childhood that much better. We were so innosent and young when everything happened... You all can call me crazy if you want to but from time to time I ocassionaly have dreams with Steve in them. The older I get the fewer I have but the craziest thing in EACH dream is the consistance. In EVERY dream I have with him in it, we are always children again, but we are grown mentally? If that makes any sense. But in EACH dream Steve had the cancer, but ALWAYS beat it. I always get this overwhelming feeling of happiness that it was all just a bad dream, but then I wake up. Realizing it was only just a dream. I think it's his way of reminding me that anything is possible. Even if it's only in a dream lasting only a short moment. It's life, we have to embrace it, live it, and take it for what it's worth, and don't take it for granted. Something I learned at the age of 12 from one of my best friends...
ReplyDelete-- Mike Ruth
Well, I guess I wasn't the only girl in class to have a crush on Steve! He was one of the first people I got to know when I moved to Elmira in third grade. Before he moved to Church Street, we used to take the same school bus home each day. Once the bus started to empty out, he would sit in the row across from me, and would hop over the seat backs one by one until he reached the front of the bus, always careful to duck when the bus driver looked up. When he reached the front, he'd start working his way back to our row in the same daring way. Of course I thought this was hilarious! After he was gone, my mom and I would visit him each summer. On my (now less frequent) visit to Elmira, I still think of Steve when driving by the house, or when visiting with his parents at church on Christmas. Steve will always be that goofy, fun-loving kid that reminds us of happy times.
ReplyDelete-- Emma Corbalan
I am SO glad that this blog was written. I don't think I've ever fully process Steve's death. The next funeral I went to was at 24 years old and only because it was very important to my husband. At 12, it was easier to pretend it didn't really happen and focus on all the trivial things. I didn't even remember the Christmas caroling at Steve's house until I saw the picture on this blog and there I am. Now, I remember the caroling so clearly.
ReplyDeleteEven though I tried to forget, Steve is still on my Christmas tree every year. I made an extra crane and attached a string for my family's tree. Just this past Christmas, I put the crane on and told my sons about my friend Steve and how important this little paper ornament is to me.
I remember Steve the most from SAGE classes. He was nice to EVERYONE. If you were a dorky kid, Steve would help you with your project and make you laugh. If you were the most popular girl in school, he had no problem talking and joking with you. There are so few children that are that caring, friendly and self confident but he always was. Someone else mentioned Steve's cartoons and I remember trying so hard to draw and write like him. We would make Calvin and Hobbes-like cartoons and he would tell me mine were great, even though his clearly outshined my feeble attempts.
I remember walking or biking home with Steve when he lived on Church Street. I remember his awesome smile and great physical comedy. I remember the day Mrs. Eckel, the music teacher, told my class that Steve had a brain tumor. I remember making cranes for hours at a time and not really thinking he was going to die. I think I should have visited him more but I know he understands and isn't upset. I remember Steve's letter to all of us. I still have it and it is still the most beautiful thing I have ever read. Even as an adult, I can't grasp how he wrote that beautiful poem to make us all feel like it was all ok. As sick as he was, he wanted to make his friends and family feel better. What an amazing kid.
Thanks for the memories and the photographs. I cried for a long time last night but it was a good cry and a needed one. Love to you all.
~Jessica Herlihy (maiden name Montgomery)
It is such a blessing to get to know my nephew through his friends' offerings here. I think of him as an adorable fun loving little boy. As Stephen got older we saw him less, and when we did visit from WA State he spent time with our daughter, Leah. We adults were visiting with each other and "the kids" did their own thing. Leah was pleased to have a cousin near her age, and we were happy about that too. My parents' 50th wedding anniversary celebration was the last I saw him alive and the only time my parents had all their grandchildren together. This whole blog reduces me to tears that need to be shed. I am so proud of Kathleen for doing this! Love and misses, Aunt Mary
ReplyDelete-- Mary D'Ambrosia